The Great Imperative meme

Okay… Now the Mad Bull should know better than this… But aparently we both may have overestimated his ‘good’ judgement… He has ‘tagged’ me [as real bloggers elucidate the practice on a seemingly daily basis,] and unlike some desolate brickwork in an inner-city, I am not to display the aerosolic artwork of the degenerate yout Tuck Everlasting who tarrys in the dark alleys of his mind, but to participate in a meme… Mad Bull’s contribution can be found quite simply by clicking this unnecessarily long link and the creator general of this particular perspicaciously prevalent slant on the quinticential blog screed, Mr. Geoffrey Philip can be found at that other link <— back there…

Let me re-start by saying that I usually wouldn’t do this… Or even pause long enough mid sip of vodka on the rocks, to give it the adequate consideration it would require to participate… BUT… Since it is my good friend Mad Bull who is practically begging for my sage wisdom in this matter… I will abrogate my usual indifferent contempt for these matters, and participate wholeheartedly as I would in jello-wrestling three lesbian midgets…

The meme is entitled My Great Imperative… Or something to that effect… I’m on my second Smirnoff before I head to the bar…

It’s quite simple really… The kind of simple one would reserve for… “I rushed into the burning house because my kids were in there and I had to save them…” Or… “There were five of them and they had knives… So I ran…” … Simple … A non-brainer, so-to-speak… And It’s really quite obvious as well… The kind of obvious one would reserve for… I don’t know… Something REALLY obvious… It’s even my tagline… LOOK UP… Yes, see it now?

My great imperative in life started, nay permutated with an epifany of sorts which struck me in 1983 at the tender and innocent age of… However old I was back then… I became painfully aware of a terrible malady which encumbered so many… Ladys… A cripplingly abhorrent condition known in the medical… And non-medical community only as “Vaginal Dryness…”

Too many women have had to endure this devastatingly awful ailment, when the cure… Or at least temporary relief is so close at hand… As a man, I was unable to grasp the complete seriousness of this situation not possessing the relevant equipment to fully experience the symptoms of this indisposition… YET! I vowed at that moment, that I would no longer be a part of the problem, I would dedicate my life to the fight, nay, the eradication of this evil plague on womandom…

True to my word, I have single-handedly given countless females immeasurable relief from vaginal dryness… But, I will not rest, I will not quit, until I have done everything in my power to banish this malvolent scourge from the face of this good Earth… I will rest when I’m dead…

So many women whom I have helped, have expressed their undying gratitude to me, and have offered me innumerable compensations for my generous labours on their behalf… But the look on their faces is enough to fuel me forever-more… I remain undaunted and steadfast in the task a hand, and will continue the good fight until I can no longer stand-up… Until every vagina I touch is wet, or at least as damp as it can be made… So join me in my crusade… No vagina gets left-behind…

Let us all be accountable…